balance.

it seems like my feelings are evenly portioned into a balance scale. i dont kno what to feel like. im mad but im happy, confused and relaxed. bummed and chill. i swear i have a mild habit of mood swings.

i want this weekend to be over. theres been so many ups and downs its not even funny.. u know how at the beach every day the tide rises and falls and can never make up its mind what level it wants to stay at? dont u think the sand would be irritated by that? i would be, and thats how i feel rite now. im retarded.

there is water all over my keyboard.

so this weekend, i got to chill with my second fam, had a good convo (one that could possibly mark a new level in a relationship), ate one meal a day for two days, went to my highschool's graduation, played mario strikers halfway through that graduation, said goodbye to a lot of friends, saw a lot of old friends, didn't get to say goodbye how i wanted to the one girl ive had a crush on for about 3 years but it'd probably never work out, went to roscoe's in hollywood and lost my appetite, discovered that driving in echo park is a straight bitch. my mood was shot (which is still fidgeting on the floor), bummed around the house for 4 hours, saw the hulk, had a jalapeño chicken sandwhich at carl's jr even tho the clerk was a stupid asshole, had a completely meaningless conversation, and now i cant get a certain someone or something out of my head. each of these things all have their own story behind it. i really just wanna go to the beach tonite and think about stuff. i think i wanna leave the state again too, like i originally wanted.

yo no sé... u tell me how to feel...